Marriage Takes Work


Marriage takes work! In fact, it takes a lot of hard work! However, somewhere, somehow, the enemy has bamboozled many Christians (women especially) into thinking it is a cake walk on a sunny, summer, Sunday afternoon! This is the furthest thing from the truth. As a result, many (again I say, especially women) are living with dashed hopes and expectations which often times end in divorce.

So how did it come to this? Well, for starters we watch too much television. The shows on t.v. are a scripted reality written to project what the producers want the audience to see as reality. The problem, however, is that many well meaning belivers walk away from these award winning shows hoping the same will happen for them.

I must admit that I am a bit of a romantic and I have fallen prey to scripted reality. One of my favorites was Pretty Woman with Julia Roberts and Richard Gere. When I first saw it, I walked away wanting my night and shining armor to come and sweep me away to a better life.

Now that I have been serving the Lord and married for over twenty years I realize that, that movie and all the rest don't portray a reality to live by. They give this false sense of romance that leaves you feeling good all the time. However, if a marriage is entered into with this mindset, most times, it will end in divorce.

Look at what the Bible says about the first marriage in Genesis 2:21-24. "And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And -- the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave -- his father and -- his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."

The last five words of this verse are key. It says, "...they shall be one flesh." These five simple words dilineate the fact that marriage takes work! It is stating that marriage is comprised of two very different sets of flesh coming together, and being made one. Spiritually speaking, this "being made one," takes place at the altar when the two are pronounced husband and wife. Naturally speaking...well, to all who have been married for any length of time, we know that, "being made one," is a life long process that often doesn't feel so good and takes a lot of work!

Oh, but thanks be to God who is more than able to make two, one in any marriage! The key to this transformation lies in the death of the husband and wife when they declare, "I will," in their marriage vows. The work lies in a constant and daily death of the will. Once this is accomplished, though work, by the grace of God, your marriage will work out for your growth, others gain and God's glory.

So whether you are reading this before you say, "I do," or after you have said, "I do," remember, marriage takes work. Trust the Lord of the work, in the work and let Him work His providential purpose and plan in you through His thing called marriage.

Love, peace and blessings,

Dr. Sheila

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